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I LOVE YOU BUT I DON'T DESIRE YOU - Part 2

Let me elaborate on LOVE as a choice.

Choice

Love is not involuntary.

The experience we have where we just 'fall in love' is nowhere near the realm of love. This is because we volunteer to love. We choose to love. We must choose to love. If there is no choice involved then it is not love.

Usually, anything involuntary is suspect. Like when you are under the influence of say, alcohol, it's even illegal to drive a vehicle because of the greater possibility of acting involuntarily. In the same way, if your 'love' for anyone is involuntary, you could be under the influence of...well, something.

Testosterone is the number one influence for men when they 'fall in love' with women.

Riches are number one for women. Ever heard of the saying, 'Don't follow after women because when you get money, women will follow after you'? If you are rich and a woman says she loves you, it most likely will be because she s under the influence of the dough!

The involuntary stuff should be in the realm of words like, fondness, desire, like, comfortable with, enjoy, you know stuff like that.

Love requires an act of choice...a decision. It must be a thoroughly calculated resolve. No feelings. No outside or internal influences.

It must be unconditional...enemy or not, young or not, female or not, rich or not, white or not, etc.
And eternal. You must decide to make it a life long commitment to love...to sacrifice yourself... for the good of another.

Let's continue later.

1Z

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Love And Desire

Love
Contrary to common belief, Love is not a feeling. It's not an emotion. It's not the thing you feel when you are in love. It's not what you feel when you are attracted to someone.
If it was, then there would not be such a thing as "unconditional Love".
Love is a Choice. It is a decision.

To what end you ask?

Love is a choice to SACRIFICE yourself for the good of another. That is why the key word in Love is GIVE. Not TAKE.

Love again, contrary to common belief, is only ONE type. Not three. Some folks claim the greek have three words for love. Well, no they don't. They only have one word. AGAPE.
The other things we call Love are not Love. Like when you feel the levels of testesterone rise in your blood stream upon seeing an attractive woman, you say "I love Her". Ha!

Desire
This is the natural capacity that people have to lust after the opposite sex. Unfortunately, we have grown to believe that it is bad. So as a result, we never consider it when starting a sexual relationship, like a marriage. Most people are now married to spouses they Love but don't desire. And they wonder why just after two weeks of marriage, or friendship, the fire seems to be quenched.
If you want more info on this topic, give me a "hola!" soonest.
Cherio!

1Z.